Paying Someone To Care

I arrived at work this morning and found a slip of paper on my desk. It was addressed from company HQ, more specifically from our new and expensive head chick… £220k a year expensive – It’s ok, we’re local government – money to BURN.

The slip was asking for our input and opinions on how well we think things are working. That’s right – how they are working and how great everything is. The wording of the two questions left no room to reply with anything negative.

“Tell me what you are proud of in your job”

“Tell me what you would like me not to change, what things shall we keep”

This provoked instant distaste in me because here is a woman who really doesn’t want to hear the truth. Using primary school tactics to try and force me to be positive about the entire shower of shit we’re all working in at the moment does nothing but infuriate. I only felt like writing:

“I’m proud of the fact I have not yet turned up to work, barged into your office and glued your face to your desk”

“I don’t think we should change our views on money saving, lets keep some public face while there is a tiny opportunity to do so and hand back about £200k of your yearly salary”.

About 2 years ago the powers that be at work decided to create a call centre. Then they diverted all the incoming phone calls from the general public and contractors to that call centre where people who’d been pulled from various other parts of the organization would attempt to answer and provide solutions to any range of questions or problems they were tasked with.

The missing link here in this fabulous initiative is that now, instead of coming through on the phone to a team of 8 people of whose shortest length of service is 6 years and longest is 30 years the phone calls go through to a call centre of new people who know very little. They in turn, keep Joe Q Public hanging on the phone while they call through to us to ask us what to do. It takes several years to become very au fait with the types of calls we receive and the answers for them so when the call centre has the high turn over of staff that it does it means we’re constantly fielding the phone calls second hand.

You know what they call this? They call it ‘Bringing services closer to the public’. How is this when my office of 26 people now feel so alienated from the public and the service they used to provide them that they don’t even want to provide it anymore?. All they’ve done with the call centre is stick a middle man in between what was a perfectly good, effective and friendly service and the taxpayers.

In short they outsourced giving a shit.

Ok, so we’ve done it for 2+ years and we’re all past the point of being ‘negative’ about it now I wish they’d just listen to the concerns of the people who’ve done the job for years, realise it hasn’t been the dream they thought it would be and can it. They burned a ton of money with this ridiculous project but they need to write it off as a bad experience and put it right.

No – we only like to flog dead horses here.

As a resident in the area my office covers I called the call centre when the name plate on my street became so old and rotten it collapsed and ended up on the village green being used as goal posts by the local kids. That phone call got lost for more than 3 weeks. It was shafted from pillar to post and when I called a second time to find out what the status of my complaint was – the very next day it got dealt with. Pretty good eh? Give them a kick and they get it sorted – although not quite. After my complaint had finished making the rounds of every other office that didn’t want to know it ended up on my very own desk…

“please could I call the resident and let her know where her road name plate is”

The best part is that while they’re ‘Bringing services closer to the public’ by sending them around their elbow to get to their arse, all the councillors, parish clerks and police all get to call us direct.

If the call centre is so good then why aren’t they using it?



  1. I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I’m afraid I did. Did you find your road name plate in the end?!

  2. Lindy said

    I so know what you mean. We had a woman at our call center that had been at the job for 26 years. They let her go when we downsized only to find out that we needed her so they brought in young kids that had no idea what they were doing & now my membership department get to field those questions 2nd hand. Only winding up to deal with pissed off members in the end. Where’s the intelligence in these decisions?

  3. foxsden said

    Suburban – laugh away.. I did!

    Lindy – Highly paid suits don’t often bring a lot of intelligence. I’m a big believer in not being able to make decisions on someone elses job unless you’ve done it yourself and most of these idiots haven’t worked their way up.

  4. Joker said

    but that’s how corporate ladders often work. Take the most myopic minded tit, give him a shiny suit, a power tie ( or a business suit if she happens to be a female ) and make them decide over things they shall never comprehend on any level. Regarding the note of the Head Chick Dick, well you know companies rarely like a party pooper. Seriously, I’ve heard this scenario in every industry I know [people in. Voice your opinion and you have two options? It will be ignored or you will be filed under “non team player” in the expendable work staff.

  5. foxsden said

    ‘Myopic minded tit’… you make me laugh! Isn’t that the truth.. There’ll be a few people added to that no. 2 option at work recently!

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