Posts Tagged Work


Cooking with gas and not electric thank goodness..

Cooking with gas and not electric thank goodness..

I’m on a course all week learning what I need to know to supervise gangs carrying out work in the road. I’ve coordinated Streetworks for years so this is something a little bit different (and actually hugely interesting – more so than you’d think). For example yesterday we looked at all the different kinds of cables you could hit whilst digging in the highway or footpath. Did you know that if you hit a High Voltage electric cable (11000v +) you can survive and think you got away with it….. However in two days time you’ll be dead because it kills you from the inside out!

Judging from the first day I’ll be learning a lot of usefull information the rest of the week. Here’s hoping I’ll learn how to spell Streetworks properly so that I don’t make spelling mistakes when searching Google for a post picture.

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It’s been a manic week so far. Work is so busy as there are 3 of us doing the job of double the amount of people. Fortunately we’ve got a great boss and she’s heard my screams of pain and is organising some help. I just can’t believe the nastiness some people put effort into in the work place. Isn’t it shit enough that we have to spend the bigger part of our lives in a job to pay the bills without actively going out of our way to be shitty to other people?

On top of this I haven’t been sleeping well. Last night I woke up at 3am and nevermind that my semi conscieous brain was whispering ‘shhh! don’t think, just go back to sleep… sleep… sleep’ part of it was all ‘I need to get Cams passport sorted, I must get his photo done, I need to test the water level in the marine tank, I’ll start working on those procedure notes for Section 74 charging tomorrow, this year I need to pick up my Spanish course again’ and it went on and on and on. At some point Wil turned over and began scratching a part of his body which led me to believe he was awake and since I was desperately bored of laying there awake at the mercy of my overactive brain I whispered ‘Are you awake?’ there was no reply. So I whispered a bit louder and then came the reply… a bit of a grunt. The kind of grunt that suggested ‘YES I’M AWAKE NOW THAT YOU’VE ASKED ME SEVERAL TIMES RATHER LOUDLY’. I shut up and somewhere between here and there I fell back asleep.

It’s not all bad – the weekend was great. We visited a couple of new Aquarium places and came home with two new corals for the marine tank. A Button Polyps and Star Xenia. They’ve settled in without any problems so far as has their new counterpart ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ the Percula Clownfish… to those of you who are fish illiterate that’s a Finding Nemo Fish. He’s a bit weird – a lot more lively than I expected and a lot less concerned with anything else in the tank. He spends all of his time actively swimming back and fourth against the glass frontage of the tank.

Aside from Napoleon, Rossi and Valentino are doing really well. Valentino moulted his shell successfully and returned much larger than before. He’s been actively digging burrows all over the place. Rossi is turning out to be one fat bastard. I actually thought he might burst earlier on when he was scoffing down blood worm. He’s brilliant – one of the most mesmorising fish I’ve ever had. Bad news however, Jeremy Beadle died. Yeah, I know Jeremy Beadle as in ‘the’ Jeremy Beadle died.. but so did our Hermit Crab. Unexplained… just seems to be one of the things we haven’t been successful with keeping in our marine tank.

The weekend went well until I came to clean out my freshwater tank. As usual Wil and I assume the same tasks that make it a speedy affair – we have a routine and it works well. He manages the waste water disposal as I control the vacuum on the tank floor and suck out any debris while syphoning 20% of the water out. However this time it had fatal consequences and I managed to get one of my Corydora fish lodged in the pipe and the suction pressure pulled some of it’s inners out of it’s gills leaving it in a really bad way. We quickly did all we could and euthanised it in a glass of Vodka. The image of one of my favourite fish laying there in the bottom of the tank with it’s guts protruding from it’s gills isn’t something that will leave my mind. And along with all the other crap I woke up thinking about this has certainly been forefront of my thoughts. A completely freak accident but completely awful and I feel shitty about it.

So there it is… I’m currently pissed as a fart after turning to a huge G&T in the hopes that  I might get a full night sleep tonight before returning to work for another battering tomorrow. Therefore I completely release myself from all spelling and grammatical errors in this post because hey, how the hell was it ever going to turn out on a day that started with me sat on the toilet having a poo while drinking my cup of tea and checking the boys homework using his iPod Touch as a calculator?

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Paying Someone To Care

I arrived at work this morning and found a slip of paper on my desk. It was addressed from company HQ, more specifically from our new and expensive head chick… £220k a year expensive – It’s ok, we’re local government – money to BURN.

The slip was asking for our input and opinions on how well we think things are working. That’s right – how they are working and how great everything is. The wording of the two questions left no room to reply with anything negative.

“Tell me what you are proud of in your job”

“Tell me what you would like me not to change, what things shall we keep”

This provoked instant distaste in me because here is a woman who really doesn’t want to hear the truth. Using primary school tactics to try and force me to be positive about the entire shower of shit we’re all working in at the moment does nothing but infuriate. I only felt like writing:

“I’m proud of the fact I have not yet turned up to work, barged into your office and glued your face to your desk”

“I don’t think we should change our views on money saving, lets keep some public face while there is a tiny opportunity to do so and hand back about £200k of your yearly salary”.

About 2 years ago the powers that be at work decided to create a call centre. Then they diverted all the incoming phone calls from the general public and contractors to that call centre where people who’d been pulled from various other parts of the organization would attempt to answer and provide solutions to any range of questions or problems they were tasked with.

The missing link here in this fabulous initiative is that now, instead of coming through on the phone to a team of 8 people of whose shortest length of service is 6 years and longest is 30 years the phone calls go through to a call centre of new people who know very little. They in turn, keep Joe Q Public hanging on the phone while they call through to us to ask us what to do. It takes several years to become very au fait with the types of calls we receive and the answers for them so when the call centre has the high turn over of staff that it does it means we’re constantly fielding the phone calls second hand.

You know what they call this? They call it ‘Bringing services closer to the public’. How is this when my office of 26 people now feel so alienated from the public and the service they used to provide them that they don’t even want to provide it anymore?. All they’ve done with the call centre is stick a middle man in between what was a perfectly good, effective and friendly service and the taxpayers.

In short they outsourced giving a shit.

Ok, so we’ve done it for 2+ years and we’re all past the point of being ‘negative’ about it now I wish they’d just listen to the concerns of the people who’ve done the job for years, realise it hasn’t been the dream they thought it would be and can it. They burned a ton of money with this ridiculous project but they need to write it off as a bad experience and put it right.

No – we only like to flog dead horses here.

As a resident in the area my office covers I called the call centre when the name plate on my street became so old and rotten it collapsed and ended up on the village green being used as goal posts by the local kids. That phone call got lost for more than 3 weeks. It was shafted from pillar to post and when I called a second time to find out what the status of my complaint was – the very next day it got dealt with. Pretty good eh? Give them a kick and they get it sorted – although not quite. After my complaint had finished making the rounds of every other office that didn’t want to know it ended up on my very own desk…

“please could I call the resident and let her know where her road name plate is”

The best part is that while they’re ‘Bringing services closer to the public’ by sending them around their elbow to get to their arse, all the councillors, parish clerks and police all get to call us direct.

If the call centre is so good then why aren’t they using it?

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So you decided to park your bike in my spot?

The new guy at work is a cyclist – somehow he thought it would be acceptable to park his rickety old bike in my cheeky bike parking spot down the hall in the office.

Does he not know WHO I AM?

(Clearly I’m the one with access to a colour printer and too much time on my hands)

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